30 second movie reviews

I’ve been making an effort lately to watch a movie a night, so far so good, here are my 5 second reviews:

The Mist

Based on a Stephen King short story, scary as sh1t (both psychological and cheap monster jumping out of the dark) with a classic ending.

The Grudge 

fvcking japanese making me freak out as I walked the dark hallway that night on the way to bed, I watched the hollywood remake with Sarah Michelle hugejugs but from what I read it’s a scene for scene remake so it’s just as good as the original.

The International

I don’t know what the fvck was going on for most of this movie, some guy gets killed by a German bank, then another guy spends the rest of the movie plotting to take down the bank then realises if he does so he’ll ruin the whole world economy so he just lets the mafia shoot the bank CEO, lame.

The Hangover

I was expecting to wet myself with laughter watching this and while it was mildly funny in places and well acted, it wasn’t the laugh riot I was led to believe.

My Bloody Valentine

Jansen Ackles (from Supernatural) plays some dude who survives a valentines day massacre at the hands of some other dude who he nearly killed by being an incompetent idiot then lots of people die and blood and oh god, why am I watching this?! I haven’t seen the original but it couldn’t be worse than this.